There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Randomize
