I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
dude. I can hear the air.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
