How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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