It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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