the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize