Why are handjobs necessary in class?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
