Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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