names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
