The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I just googled if crying burns calories
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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