you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
