Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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