He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
