I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize