I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
