I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
no, he came in my armpit
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize