you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
