you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
