Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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