Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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