best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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