Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
