yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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