The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
