I hate all girls vehemently.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
