There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
