totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
