I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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