good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
His nipple licking is glorious
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