I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
