tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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