My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
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This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
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And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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