i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
