week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
