I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You made out with two different species that night
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
