This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
