i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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