One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
