she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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