I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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