My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
my poor anus
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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