Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize