I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
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