nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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