You really coming over, don't trick.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
