I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize