so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
