i just wanna soil my oats bro
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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