so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
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