Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize