just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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