This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
