And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
