Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
